Please, Let Me Explain

As is fairly evident, I did not complete ANYTHING on my to-do list. I am SUCH a failure. Please excuse me while I flog myself. Now, please allow me to espouse my excuses as to why. And they are all excuses. I was planning on sitting down yesterday and working on it during football. However, unforeseen circumstances prevented me from being able to focus on that. Sadly, I let some other things interfere with my personal life, and I apologize. So let me give you a rundown of what I am looking at. I want to change the layout of this space. First, I want to create a banner. As I have stated before Photoshop makes me want to break out in hives. I either need to just bite the bullet and figure it out or take a course. Neither of which makes me happy. Once I get the new banner figured out, I want to change the layout. Probably to the basic white and move some stuff around. See…in theory this stuff is simple. But actually sitting down and doing it is a whole other story.

I had actually somewhat started on the knitting post, but realized that I don’t have anything really great worth sharing, at least not compared to some of the other things out there in the innernets. But then again, it doesn’t have to be great. However, the item I am currently working on is the “Scarf from Hell” and I am just trying to get through it. That’s the one I was going to post about. But I just can’t bring myself to do anything else with it…except try and finish it. Other than that I just have a baby blanket for my niece, that I absolutely fell in love with the first time I saw her, that I will probably never get through. It was supposed to be a birthday present…missed that one. Now, it’s supposed to be a Christmas gift. We’ll see. That’s about it. So there is not much to talk about. I could have discussed items I have already done, which is what I was about to do, when I was so rudely distracted with drama, and the fact that I had to take a nap. In all seriousness, I will have to think about how I am going to do this as far as post layouts, etc.

This leads me to the food post. I was going to post a recipe that I was trying for roasted pumpkin seeds. But by the time I thought about taking pictures, I was done. That sort of defeated the purpose. I also need to figure out how I am going to work out the cooking posts. I really like the way The Pioneer Woman Cooks! posts her recipes with the actions shots. But I am not near the photographer she is. So I don’t know if I should try the action shots, or just post a picture of the finished product along with the recipes, or perhaps a combination of both depending on the difficulty of the recipe.

See the craziness that occupies my brain? How do I keep it all in you ask? Oh yeah…lists.

In The Name of Progress

I don’t have any thoughts organized today. It is way too close to the weekend, and I’m a little scatterbrained trying to finish up the week and get ready for the weekend. By the way, I did get a little list out the other day. WHEW!! I thought my head was about to explode. Now, however, I feel that I need to make another list. I know…I know, your shaking your head. The crazy doesn’t rest. But the items on that list are ongoing items. I need another one for items that can be done now, so that I can feel like I am making progress.

Speaking of progress…I am so proud of me!! I figured out how to add pictures to this blog thing! Pretty soon I’ll be sending it off to college. *Tear*. Seriously, I have even started working on a banner. NEVER thought I would be doing that!! I mean, I am not a technological idiot, but I don’t exactly write code in my sleep either (e.g. my husband). I have no problem with learning something new, but Photoshop makes me want to hide in the corner and eat my hair. I know that I am way behind the curve ball and such because blogs were popular like 5 five years ago...duh! I have always been unfashionable. But learning how to make this thing look like the picture in my head is a pain in my arse, and I am not interested in paying someone else to do it. I am not complaining, simply stating the facts. So…as I ramble on…I am making a list of items I am hoping to accomplish for this thing over the weekend. Maybe, I’ll actually do it, if I lay it out here.

Here goes:
· Complete at least one knitting post w/pictures
· Complete at least one cooking post w/pictures
· Complete new layout & banner

Also, I am on a mission people, and I need your help. Your mission, should you choose to accept it….please tell me if you know of a place where I can find some chickens. Before your imagination runs away with you, I want to find some chickens so that I can take pictures of them. THAT’S ALL!! There is a reason, don’t worry. I haven’t completely lost my mind and want to randomly take pictures of chickens for no reason whatsoever. Although that’s not a bad idea

Okay…please don’t hold my feet to the fire if I don’t get all of them completed (unless I ask), but I will do my best. Please send help if you hear I am in the corner eating my hair.

So Much on My Mind & Jack Frost Nipping at My Nose

I hate it when I have so much on my mind, yet I can not do anything about it. I don’t even have the time to make a list because I am too busy. And y’all…I am a list makin’ fool. I have lists for my lists. I have to tell you, I was absolutely thrilled to my core when I saw my husband make a list. It’s bad. I know it doesn’t make sense. I can’t keep up with a journal, but I can make a list like nobodies business. Go figure.

AND just to give an idea of the level of my crazy…because I am here to prove it, there is so much going through my head that I am afraid to write it down because it will be out of order and crazy on the paper. You see, even my lists have to have a certain amount of order. I know…I need professional help. So, you might say, “Well, why not right it down and reorganize it”. You would be a rational human being. I, on the other hand, would rather fret and chew my finger nails trying to remember all of the things that need to go on my list until I have it in order and can write it down.

All of that craziness being said, I am making it my goal to jot down what I can today, and sit down tonight and create a solid list with a nice cup of spiced up cider...BECAUSE IT’S BELOW 65° OUTSIDE!! Pretty soon it might be snowing…in San Antonio…yeah right!! Good thing people’s brain shut down in this town once the temperature gets below 70°, because it is soooo fun to drive in that traffic. Oh well!! At least there will be cider when I get home and a nice pretty list to look forward to.

My Life as the Benny Hill Theme Song

As it sometimes occurs, I needed to pick up a few things at the store this morning. And by “store”, I mean Wal-Mart, because that is UNFORTUNATELY the only place to get a variety of things. It’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that it’s all there is, and it pisses me off. Stepping off the soapbox, what started as a three item trip...ended up being a little more. And by “little” more, I mean we had to take out a quick second mortgage. In the process, we picked up a magazine called "Hobby Farms". In it there was an article about fainting goats. Holy crap...that is funny. It's sad that it's a genetic disorder, but it's even funnier when you set it to the Benny Hill Theme Song. You don't even have to imagine. Go here. It made me realize that I want my life theme song to be “The Benny Hill Theme Song”. Think about that for a minute…that is HILARIOUS…well, at least it is to me.

The Thinker Continued...

After yesterday’s post about blogging, I started thinking about the blogs that I enjoy reading and why. I thought that I would share them with you:

My absolute favorite and first is Crazy Aunt Purl. I have been reading her blog now for over three years. Perhaps it’s just because she took my blogging virginity, but I have an affinity for her. I have watched her survive her divorce with four cats, learn how to knit, rediscover dating, and write a book about it all.

The second favorite is Confessions of a Pioneer Woman. I live vicariously through her. Since she lives out in the secluded country, and that is where I hope to be someday, I guess I feel I need to get ideas from her on how not to go crazy…even though she already is.

The other two are Dad Gone Mad and Dooce. I like these two because of their humor, mixed with seriousness. It puts it out there and in your face, and you can take it or leave it. They don’t care. That’s what I love about blogs. It’s also the hardest thing for me to get. I have not made this blog public because I guess it would crush my little ego to have some miserable individual comment that I am an idiot. I only have one thing to say: "Hey genius, I know I’m an idiot. Why else would I throw out my personal thoughts on the INTERNET for brilliant people like you to read and comment rudely about?" See…it wouldn’t be pretty. Sadly, I am still working on that whole “sticks and stones” thing.

The Thinker

For some reason, over the past few days, I have had the feeling that I had nothing to write about. This is the exact same thing I go through with journal writing. In all honesty, starting a blog is probably not the best idea I have ever had. My journaling history has been sporadic, at best. I would lose my motivation, and then decide I need to start writing down my feelings. Great! That will help…because it has worked so well in the past. Funny how easily we can lie to ourselves.

I would start a new journal. Usually, I would have to go out and buy a new journal…because I couldn’t allow my new thoughts to be tainted by my previously thought thoughts. Hello all! Welcome to Crazyland, Population: Melissa! For the first few days (read:hours), things were great! I was Zen and writing down all of my thoughts and getting them out of my system, but then I would get lazy. I don’t need to journal? What’s the point? What good is it doing? I know what I am thinking…why do I need to write it down. Now, I’m not feeling calm anymore…and so death comes to my journaling journey….yet again. Please don’t think I am kidding. At last count I have about 16 different journals that are not complete. I do, however, have 1 (ONE) that is about ¾ complete….that was progress people. Notice...was.

What IN THE WORLD makes me think that I should be blogging? I have been thinking about this for a few days…and I think I have figured it out. Accountability. I actually have a lot of things to write about, but for whatever reason I just don’t (possibly also because I am not a very good writer). Well, now, I have an audience, albeit a small one, that may or may not be waiting to see what I have to say…in all of its crazy, poorly written glory!! That’s pretty cool. Now I can get it out there in the open. Obviously, there will be some things I won’t discuss here…but if it’s any consolation, I probably won’t write them in my shiny, new… and empty journal either.

I Thought We'd Be Facing My Good Side

As we approach our four year anniversary, I have been spending a lot of time reflecting on my relationship with my husband, and the man he is. I could probably just write on and on about all of the things he has done, or places he has been, the people he has met, the things he has done for others. But anyone who knows him already knows who he is. To say the least, he is the most accomplished person I know, and there is no one that I am more proud of. I am so ecstatic that I have had the opportunity to spend these moments of my life with him, and I hope to have the opportunity to spend many more with him. I can not even begin to explain the scope of my feelings for him, who he is, and what he stands for, so I will not even try to in this post.

Doug, I Love You!

Old MacDonald Had A Farm

When I was kid…my parents would send me “down to the valley” to visit my grandparents. I enjoyed it…as much as a young kid can enjoy being away from their parents for two weeks…kicking and screaming. My favorite part was going to visit my great grandparents…they had horses…and rabbits. I loved being outside with the animals. No need to have polite conversation, no need to pretend that you, a kid, cared about what the grown-ups were talking about. I spent all day out there. Ever since then, I have wanted to go back. Go back to that space, back to the country.

There is just something about it to me. It makes me so happy, and peaceful. To think of being self sufficient, and, to put it plainly, live the simple life, as Thoreau said, or was it Nichole Richie? Life is too short…to spend it worried about half of the crap that we spend our time worrying about these days. I’m not going to mention all of the things (I couldn’t even begin), but to me it’s the materialism and all the psychological implications that come with “keeping up with the joneses” that drives me crazy. This, of course, is strictly my opinion.

More importantly than all of this…I want chickens y’all!! I want fresh eggs. I want to wake up to the sound of a rooster. Although, at this point, I’m not sure we are going to have any roosters…but it’s the thought. Someone should invent a rooster alarm clock!! If you guys find one…let me know?

My Knitting Intro

So…I knit. Now, when I say knit…don’t get excited. I can knit, purl, and decrease. That’s about it. Now, don’t get me wrong there is a lot you can do with only those stitches. However, I must admit a slight feeling of inadequacy when I see and hear about the other things that people can knit. Honestly, it makes me want to curl up in the corner and eat my hair. In all fairness though, my knitting journey has been a bumpy one.
When I was about 10 years old, my step-great-grandmother taught me how to crochet. I think I remember liking it. Doesn’t matter, I decided about a year and a half ago that I could not possible live another day without knowing how to knit. So…I took my happy little self to, of all places….Wal-Mart, and bought one of those teach-yourself-to knit kits and went home to get this party started. Being left-handed I naturally went to the section for left-handers. Seems logical, right? Um…yeah. So I taught myself how to cast-on and the knit stitch. I knitted an entire scarf. WooHoo!!
Then one day…in a fit of knitting loneliness, I dragged my mom to the new knitting store in town (by the way, my mom bought the same knit kit), to talk to other knitters. I started up a conversation with the store owner and explained to her that what I was doing seemed wrong. She didn’t understand what I was talking about when I tried to explain to her how I knit. Fortunately, I had my most recent scarf with me. I brought it in and demonstrated. “You’re knitting backwards”, she said. She explained that it wasn’t that I was doing it wrong; I was doing everything in a mirror image. She went on to explain that the only way it might be a problem is if I try to knit from a pattern, as everything would be backwards and reverse. Oh, well, what a relief, because I had fully planned to knit nothing but scarves in a mirror garter stitch for the REST OF MY LIFE. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!! I like a challenge just as much as anyone else, but really now.
So, after I stepped off the ledge from the shock of wasting months trying to figure this stuff out, I asked if she could show me the correct way to knit. I didn’t even care if she taught me how to knit right-handed…and she did. Thankfully, I have been knitting correctly for about a year. All of that being said…I get so discouraged when I see some of the wonderful things other knitters create. The most I have ever done are several scarves, a few bracelet purses, started a baby blanket, and I have taught myself to crochet as well (I rock the ten minute coaster – even though it still takes me an hour). Perhaps I don’t knit as often as I should/could. But really, I have quit smoking and still don’t have enough time to knit 20 pairs of socks, 5 hats, 12 scarves and still have dinner on the table by 6pm like some knitters. Guess I’ll have to work on that.

Status Update

So....Over the next few days, I will begin laying out the site, getting up the "About Me" stuff, etc. Currently my intent is for this place to be a mind dump. It is where I will collect little thoughts, interesting quotes, rants, recipes, knitting/crochet/craft projects, updates/plans for our land, and anything else that catches my fancy. Oh yeah...and stuff about chickens!!! (More about that later).

Hi...

I'm new....bear with me. I've spent all day thinking about how to go about this thing... my poor little brain needs a rest.